A Little Bit of Advice

Dinner last night was at a friend's home. Well, our hostess is someone I do not know too well, and to me, is more of a good acquaintance. We see each other often since our daughters are very good friends. We all laughed out loud when her husband asked, "Is this the first time you have come to our home?" and when I replied, "No, I have been here so many times, just not inside!"

They had actually motioned me over inside on those particular days and nights -- for a quick chat over tea or even dinner one time when they were right about to start. But with this small, many times uncontrollable child by my side, I most often decline from social invitations. I was there as chauffeur, and nothing more.

When we arrived, my mother-in-law was out of breath. There were two sets of stairs and it was, for her, an incredible feat to climb them. She has never had knee surgery, but complains often of leg pain, and her excessive weight does not help contribute to that health issue.

So we sat, for what must have felt like 15 or 20 minutes, listening to her catch her breath, watching the antics of my youngest son, and hearing the music within the kitchen -- the tapping of the pot stirrers, the closing of the cabinets and refrigerator doors, the light clanging of the lids. The hostess's mother-in-law appeared to be cooking up a storm. I was impressed.

Later on in the evening, after the other guests arrived, the food was served, and an air of festivity pervaded the air, the hostess engaged in conversation with me. I complimented her on the delicious food, even asking her which dishes she prepared. She replied that she did not cook any of them on her own, that instead, each dish was prepared by both her and her mother-in-law, echoing what the elder had earlier told me -- they cooked with "teamwork."

Intrigued with this concept, I asked her to elaborate, veering us to the general discussion of living with mother-in-law. She, after all, was the only other person I knew who also did so, living with her mother-in-law for seven years. Having this one year seniority over me, I asked her for her best advice. She assured me that we were not alone, naming two other ladies in the city who also lived with their mother-in-law, one of them for thirteen years now. At that, in unison, we both gasped in admiration and then laughed.

Soon my mother-in-law waddled towards us, presumably to check on her youngest grandson, or maybe on my own activity. As she approached, my hostess looked seriously towards me, and in a soft, but firm voice told me, "Just be calm, calm, and ignore, ignore everything."

And that wrapped up my evening last night -- a great dinner and little bit of advice from a kind, wise friend.